I’ve had three Caesarean sections. I laboured with my first after a textbook, early induction and intervention leads to Surgery kinda way. I then made the decision to have the following sections to eliminate going through what I went through with my first.
I have very little angst over them. I’m not of the popular opinion of ‘healthy baby and that’s all that matters so get over it’ notion. The mothers physical health and mental health is supremely important and should never be discounted. However, I don’t dwell, it doesn’t make me angry, I have no issues regarding them. That was how I birthed my babies and that’s it.
My biggest disappointment when I think about it was not having the vaginal birth itself. To this day I’ve never seen one in the flesh. My sister birthed her babies with my mum and her husband, my sister in laws, the same. My friends, the same. I’m no ones birthing partner. I’m not a midwife. I have 3 sons who will probably have wives with mothers. Unless I happen to be a part of some freak labour at Coles when I’m shopping, I’ll probably never get to experience the sheer magnificence that is a woman giving birth.
And I know this is probably not something that anyone else thinks about. But I do. I feel like it is part of our wiring and how we are built. The village, the community, womanhood. Being supportive and involved.
I don’t want to go through this life having not witnessed the strength and pure joy of a natural birth. The emotion and out of body experience. The elation and pride.
There’s a million things that I won’t experience. But those things are in my control. To choose to participate in or not. It didn’t occur to me at the time that my births were that opportunity. And how much I wanted it.
So. I’m not having another child just to tick it off my bucket list and I’m not going to break into a hospital and burst right in on a crowning woman. But if anyone has no support and needs an unqualified, ‘inappropriately timed joke to lighten the mood’ kinda person, I’m your woman.